Saturday, January 21, 2006
I Have A Drinking Problem...
I've known it for a long time, but have been afraid to admit it. Lately, I've been through some personal introspection and have been able to come to grips with my disorder. Seemingly, all of my family, co-workers and peers have no difficulty with this issue whatsoever. In fact, Vancouverites - nay, all British Columbians - are known around the world for their ability to handle these types of drinks. With all humility I admit that it's true...
I am "hot-beverage-challenged."
Dealing with a cold the past 2 weeks I have been making myself a lot of tea (green tea and regular Lipton's). I like tea. I like hot chocolate. I even like Starbucks vanilla steamed milk. But if I drink it too soon, I burn my tongue. So I blow on it and inevitably it cools down too much. "Just sip it slowly", the experts say. Well, those experts have had years of killing their taste buds and nerve endings by guzzling scalding coffee every day. It hurts me when I sip (I just read that line over and I sound like a wuss). I've even tried sticking out my pinky finger like the British - didn't help.
This morning I made a cup of tea (in the YMI mug that Dennis gave me) and I sat down to play with Kylan. After giving him breakfast, Beth came to take care of him so I went and had a shower. Later in the morning I saw my tea, waiting for me. It was cold. This was not the first time I've ruined a cup of tea by waiting for it to cool and then forgetting about it.
So maybe I should give up the hot drink? Maybe diet Coke with lime will have the same soothing effect on my sore throat as the Lipton's people do? I certainly won't burn the inside of my mouth while sipping something on the rocks. Or maybe I can rig up a hot drink IV? I'm fairly sure that tea taken intravenously wouldn't burn my lips.
Regardless of my next steps (12?), I must confess to the blog world my inability to master the hot beverage. Sorry Starbucks. Sorry Tim Horton, wherever you are. Sorry Tetley Tea elves (do they live in a tree with the Keebler's?). I burn my tongue if I drink too soon. It's unsatisfying if I wait too long. I am convinced that I will have to live with this disability for my remaining days. Sigh. Pass the iced tea please....
I am "hot-beverage-challenged."
Dealing with a cold the past 2 weeks I have been making myself a lot of tea (green tea and regular Lipton's). I like tea. I like hot chocolate. I even like Starbucks vanilla steamed milk. But if I drink it too soon, I burn my tongue. So I blow on it and inevitably it cools down too much. "Just sip it slowly", the experts say. Well, those experts have had years of killing their taste buds and nerve endings by guzzling scalding coffee every day. It hurts me when I sip (I just read that line over and I sound like a wuss). I've even tried sticking out my pinky finger like the British - didn't help.
This morning I made a cup of tea (in the YMI mug that Dennis gave me) and I sat down to play with Kylan. After giving him breakfast, Beth came to take care of him so I went and had a shower. Later in the morning I saw my tea, waiting for me. It was cold. This was not the first time I've ruined a cup of tea by waiting for it to cool and then forgetting about it.
So maybe I should give up the hot drink? Maybe diet Coke with lime will have the same soothing effect on my sore throat as the Lipton's people do? I certainly won't burn the inside of my mouth while sipping something on the rocks. Or maybe I can rig up a hot drink IV? I'm fairly sure that tea taken intravenously wouldn't burn my lips.
Regardless of my next steps (12?), I must confess to the blog world my inability to master the hot beverage. Sorry Starbucks. Sorry Tim Horton, wherever you are. Sorry Tetley Tea elves (do they live in a tree with the Keebler's?). I burn my tongue if I drink too soon. It's unsatisfying if I wait too long. I am convinced that I will have to live with this disability for my remaining days. Sigh. Pass the iced tea please....
# posted by Dairn @ 2:07 PM 
Comments:
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Yup, you're right - sounds too whiny.
First you complain about a little rain (never a complaint about the six inches of snow we had fall in about 6 hours a few days ago here in Vernon). Now, your hot drinks are too hot? What next?
Really, i see only one solution to your problems here. Switch to drinking vodka. Firstly, it does not need to be anything other than room temperature to be imbibed (although most prefer it in the company of something cold). Second, get enough Finlandia (or Smirnoffs, or some other variety) in ya and you will be so relaxed you'll never bother to complain about the rain or anything else ever again. And third, although it may not be hot when it goes past the lips, this amazing drink will sufficiently warm your insides ,thereby keeping you toasty warm on those wet rainy days that you complain so much about (how can you possibly complain about RAIN in the WINTER ??!!?!?).
Glad to be of help, buddy...
First you complain about a little rain (never a complaint about the six inches of snow we had fall in about 6 hours a few days ago here in Vernon). Now, your hot drinks are too hot? What next?
Really, i see only one solution to your problems here. Switch to drinking vodka. Firstly, it does not need to be anything other than room temperature to be imbibed (although most prefer it in the company of something cold). Second, get enough Finlandia (or Smirnoffs, or some other variety) in ya and you will be so relaxed you'll never bother to complain about the rain or anything else ever again. And third, although it may not be hot when it goes past the lips, this amazing drink will sufficiently warm your insides ,thereby keeping you toasty warm on those wet rainy days that you complain so much about (how can you possibly complain about RAIN in the WINTER ??!!?!?).
Glad to be of help, buddy...
My Brother, this is a struggle for which I have battled since birth.. thus, you are no longer alone in being a complete sissy when dealing with hot beverages.
Al: And I thought I had a drinking problem! lol
Steve: Thanks for being in this with me. But it's sad that your parents gave you scorching drinks in your bottle as an infant - child abuse, anyone?
Tamara: Aha, microwave the drinks. Doesn't that just make them hot? Our micro is from the 70's so I'd probably need to put it in for 5 minutes!
Steve: Thanks for being in this with me. But it's sad that your parents gave you scorching drinks in your bottle as an infant - child abuse, anyone?
Tamara: Aha, microwave the drinks. Doesn't that just make them hot? Our micro is from the 70's so I'd probably need to put it in for 5 minutes!
D -
hey, I thought i was being quite clever! I mean, how often does one get the opportunity to suggest that a Pastor fix his self-proclaimed drinking problem by pouring himself some vodka and 7-Up?
Besides, between the stress of the election here, work stress, marital stress, Mario Lemieux retiring (what - AGAIN!?!?!!!??!), and me wondering whether it is possible to finish with Negative points in the hockey pool - man, that Vodka is soiunding pretty danged good right now!
Plus...the church board just gave our Pastor the boot. Interested in a PAOC position here in Vernon with Alexis Park Church, D? If our out-going Pastor moves away, that position may also include Chaplain of the Vernon Vipers hockey club, too.
Of course, rumours around town say that our board has just gotten rid fo their third or fourth Pastor. Might be some folks here have a little too much starch in their collar...
Peace out!
hey, I thought i was being quite clever! I mean, how often does one get the opportunity to suggest that a Pastor fix his self-proclaimed drinking problem by pouring himself some vodka and 7-Up?
Besides, between the stress of the election here, work stress, marital stress, Mario Lemieux retiring (what - AGAIN!?!?!!!??!), and me wondering whether it is possible to finish with Negative points in the hockey pool - man, that Vodka is soiunding pretty danged good right now!
Plus...the church board just gave our Pastor the boot. Interested in a PAOC position here in Vernon with Alexis Park Church, D? If our out-going Pastor moves away, that position may also include Chaplain of the Vernon Vipers hockey club, too.
Of course, rumours around town say that our board has just gotten rid fo their third or fourth Pastor. Might be some folks here have a little too much starch in their collar...
Peace out!
Al, send me an email if you're gonna write a letter. Haha!
And don't get too personal in the comments section, some people actually read these every so often (talking about Mario Lemieux on a public forum, what gall!).
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And don't get too personal in the comments section, some people actually read these every so often (talking about Mario Lemieux on a public forum, what gall!).
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